Letting go of bad habits before they become destructive


You don’t have to go to school to understand that bad habits are harmful to you in one way or the other. Smoking and doing drugs, for example, can lead to future health problems. The difference between Muslims and other people when it comes to bad habits is that we have one extra reason to stop our bad habits: Islam. You see in Islam, it’s a sin to intentionally do things that will harm your body. It is also a sin to do things that will harm other people as well as things that will affect you in a negative way. Shouldn’t that be an enough incentive to stop our bad habits? Keep reading to find out.

Let’s start with smoking. Smoking is harmful to the lungs as well as anything the smoke passes through to get to your lungs. It is harmful to people passing by you as well. Walking behind a person who is smoking is extremely annoying and it gets even more annoying if that person is walking slowly. (I’m a New Yorker, so I naturally have no patience for slow walkers, especially tourists!) It is proven that second hand smoking is also harmful. Therefore, people breathing your smoke will also have the same lung problems. Lastly, it’s a waste of money. 
So how many sins are you committing by smoking? A lot! Not only is it a sin to cause harm upon yourself but it is also a sin to harm others around you as well as wasting your money on such sinful products. So the best way to stop committing those sins is to stop smoking and the best way to stop smoking is to just stop smoking. As hard as that may sound, if you truly fear Allah, you would never do it again. The addiction that comes with smoking is hard to ignore. Once you’ve smoked before, your body starts to ache for more. But nobody said that stopping a bad habit would be easy. And nobody said that being a Muslim would be easy either. As Muslims, we go through tests and trials every single day. So having the patience to stop smoking is not only good for stopping the habit but its also good for being a better Muslim as well.
Drugs fall under the same category as smoking with the exception that it doesn’t harm anybody else but yourself (please correct me if I’m wrong). It’s harmful to you and it’s a waste of money. It is also just as addicting as smoking and it can be just as hard or even harder to stop doing drugs once you’re in it. So the best way to stop doing drugs is to simply stop doing it. It may be addicting but if you fear Allah, trust me, you’ll stop.
I would mention alcohol but I’m sure everybody knows that drinking is absolutely forbidden in Islam and no one should even be involved in it to begin with. Therefore I will mention one last bad habit: masturbation. If there is one thing all these bad habits have in common, it’s that they are all addicting. Masturbating is no exception. Many Muslims fall victim to this due to the fact that sex is in the air when it comes to living in the West. Everything is about sex because sex sells. Teenagers in high school are almost forced to have sex because everybody is talking about how they “did it”. Based on all this, it’s pretty understandable why a Muslim would do this but at the same time it is definitely not an excuse for a Muslim to do so. One of the best ways to stop is to get married early as this was recommended by the Prophet Muhammed (PBUH). However, not many people have the means to get married early and although they might be physically ready to do so, they are not ready financially. Therefore one should be patient and wait for the time when they can get married. This might be a long time but one has to realize that this is another test from Allah and therefore you MUST stop this habit. Another way to stop is to stop thinking about things that will lead to it. For example if you feel like you are thinking about something that will lead to masturbation, try thinking about something that will completely occupy your mind. What I recommend is to think about death. If you know someone that may have died or you have a family member that died, think about them. Thinking about death will help you remember that death is around the corner and you wouldn’t want to die while in the act of masturbating. 
Now there are some online articles that state that masturbating is actually healthy. That is pure nonsense. What’s so healthy about having a nasty addiction that turns you into a MONSTER? An addiction that makes you act like an animal with no brains; only acting on instinct and the desire to pleasure yourself. Masturbation and pornography (another major sin in Islam) usually goes hand in hand. What’s so healthy about pleasuring yourself while watching videos of women being degraded and being used as sex symbols? What’s so healthy about the negative consequences of doing such acts such as the automatic negative view of all women you might interact with? If you’re really addicted, you might even have such disgusting and shameful thoughts about your own mother, sisters and daughters! Wa audubilah. You might even end up having a haram relationship even though you’re already married just because your spouse might not be as good as what you’ve seen in the videos. Masturbation is the ultimate reason that drives men in Western societies to rape women.  I also heard that masturbation can cause back pain (I don’t know, just wanted to put that in there). Now tell me, what’s healthy about all that?
In conclusion, all these bad habits have one thing in common (besides the fact that they are all addicting once you get into them) which is the only way to stop these habits, is to fear Allah. If you fear Allah, then you will automatically try your best to not sin. Of course, everybody sins, but Allah loves those who go back to him and beg for forgiveness. Unfortunately, there are many Muslims who aren’t so God-fearing and therefore, fearing Allah is simply not enough for those people. If you fall into that category, then I suggest you worry about how to restore your relationship with Allah before even thinking about stopping your bad habits. Not having a good relationship with Allah is even worse than all these habits combined. You must maintain a close relationship with Allah if you want to be a righteous Muslim. Try going to the Mosque more or read more Quran. Learn the ways of Prophet Muhammed (PBUH) and attend lectures about Islam. There are thousands of YouTube videos of lectures about various topics in Islam. I suggest you start watching them. Once you have restored your relationship with Allah, there would actually be no need to worry about those bad habits as you would have stopped doing them in the process of trying to learn more about Islam. In the end, our purpose in life is to please Allah so we can go to heaven. It would be a real shame to end up in hell due to the sins that have piled up from these bad habits. Fear Allah because to Him, we shall return. 
I pray to Allah to help us stop committing these sins, to forgive our sins, to guide us to the path of righteousness and to grant us paradise. Ameen.

5 responses to “Letting go of bad habits before they become destructive”

  1. i have committed sin like having sex before marriage but the thing is nw i m habitte to it n i cnt stop wat to do plz help???? i cnt marry the person whoom i had sex wit??? n i m already engaged

  2. I pray to Allah that He gets you out of this problem!!! :(….its very difficult dear bro/sis..but try to just cut off the relationship with your partner by any means..ANY MEANSSS…its better if you talk to a good Muslim brother who can help you out…:)

  3. Assalamu Alaikkum dear brother in Islam,
    I'm a sinned one who happened to search the net for the punishments of entering into a physical relation with a non muslim boy that too being very pious and religious. I'm a practicing girl and i dont knw whether i can call me a Muslimah yet after committing the sin. I hail from a religious family too. But due to many reasons neither me nor my family could get me married even at my 29th year of age. I had been tryng to maintain my status of not letting any man touch my body, but recently i fall in a relation with one of my colleague which eventually turned out to a physical relation (not an intercourse, Alhamdulillaah).. I'm dying of remorse.. Don't know what to do or tooo afraid of how Allaah is goin to punish me..
    No one can do anything for me at this point, but I request you to please include me tooo in your duas..
    Jazakkallaah Khair…
    May Allaah forgive me and lead me to the right..

  4. Aoa
    I m married woman, ve 2 beautiful kidz alhamdulilah…it's been 7yrs to my marriage..my husband is an angel mA fulfill all my needs n loves me too…only prob is he is not talkative, expressive n he is always busy wid work n travelling..
    Before my marriage I had f/s wid 4,5 boys..though 1 at a time n i thought I ll marry this guy..which led me to do sins kissing hugging astaghfirullah
    After 1yr of my wedding v went for yeah n i seriously repented for my sins I really felt disgusted…my life was going smooth but 1.5 yrs back v got transferred to a new country..I was dealing with all d procedures I met a guy A..he was from a refrence so I cudnt stop him from calling or cracking jokes..in few days v were so friendly n comfortable with each other then I came here to my husband..place was new I thought it's ok if I talk to him unless I settle down n make my social circle..
    He is a good guy always prays on time, never tells a lie..he told me that he is keeping just because of his kidz otherwise due to domestic issues his relation is really bad with his wife..they dont ve physical relation from more than'3yrs now..
    We used to talk all d times he used 2 ask me wat r u cooking, show me..where r u going..means he was with me 24*7..praising me, telling me how beautiful I m,i too started feeling abt him..Last time wen I went to my country v came really close n ve done sin(not sex alhamdulilah) I cudnt resist him n kept thinking abt him..even last yr v went for umrah in haram I closed my eyes my saw him in ihraam..I did touaf for him too.
    Few days back unfortunately his younger unmarried sis died suddenly..I was so shocked my upset n i felt as I was dead n i was going to confront Allah..I started crying madly dat how can I with sooo many sins…(since I was in relationship with him I used to feel the burden of my unmarried life sins too..)1 more thing I wud like to tell dat I always knew I was doing it wrong to my husband n to myself too I tried to break up many times but I cudnt I blocked him but after 3,4 painful days or seeing his emotional status I used to just unblock him..)
    I agained decided to leave him n after consoling him 2,3 days I just left him I knew his this wound is soo big dat it doesnt matter to him much if I left..he was already upset dat he dint stop me once n said he loves me n ll always luv me…after 3 days I was going crazy with d guilt dat I left him alone in his bad time I called him to tel him real reason y I left him..he dint pick up my cals..I just dropped msg dat I left him for Allah's sake..as I dont want punishment for me n for him as well..now I m fighting with myself..I m feeling really alone…I m crying but don't know either I m crying for him or for forgiveness..how shall I console myself by thinking wat?? Wat if I interact him somewhere?? Wat if he comes back.?? Plzzz I m v weak..ask Allah to not test me again…I ve taken a step for His favour…make my heart strong n i ll die as loyal wife my husband is a nice man doesn't deserve a cheat wife..plzz help me advise me..